Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize