Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize