Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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