i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize