this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a search helicopter?!
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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