Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize