Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize