PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i think i have two assholes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize