she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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