totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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