i permit you to call me
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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