Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
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You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
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Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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