Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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