Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
he was CRYING into my vagina
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
He better not be in your backpack
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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