why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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