Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize