i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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