would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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