Say something about gay babies.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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