I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
So much rum. So many feels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize