I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
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You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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