I can text with my tongue
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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