For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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