can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize