Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize