I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize