So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
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Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
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Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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