I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Randomize