just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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