btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
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i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
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telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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