Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize