My sheets look like a crime scene.
love makes seman taste better
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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