I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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