Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize