Your tits are I can't wait for
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize