I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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