He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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