I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize