is wine microwaveable?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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