Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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