she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize