I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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