thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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