i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
The Olympian is in my bed
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
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