omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize