My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
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His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
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It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
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