Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Randomize