I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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