I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
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Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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