Need sex. Gaining weight.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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